My mom just told me that after i turned eight i stopped growing mentally and emotionally
i really need to stop putting makeup on my cats..
he said i ruined lesbian porn for him
Sorry for punching you in the face last night. I should have known the boxing gloves were a bad idea from the start.
Any coincidence your getting married tomorrow and it's the most predicted day for the rapture? Just saying
I just laid my head on this pillow and I smelt your penis. It was comforting.
I used the light from the first guy's text notification to be able to snapchat the second guy in the dark. I am too good at juggling guys.
Just had to double check that I had pants on. THAT kind of weekend.
Beyoncé wouldn't let anything bad happen here
See, remember when you wanted to get an Ashley Madison account and I told you not to and you hated me? You. Are. Welcome.
who says I'm not relevant to the kids today? Just had snapchat sex, blows the roof off aim cyber sex
He turned on read receipts specifically so i'd know he was ignoring me.
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
I just noticed, at some point last night I got on iTunes and purchased over 100 classical piano songs.
So I slept with some guy last night and when I woke up in the am couldnt remember his name. I text him n asked "How do you spell your name?" to try n find out and all he replied was "With an A." WTF!?
Randomize
