wat bout pragnant strippers??
He is an equal opportunity slut.
please hurry. your mom just evil laughed to herself in the kitchen like she's plotting my death.
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
i'm sitting in the pool eating chicken pot pie with my little brother's friend. moments like these are the reason i love weed.
And then she banged "the first Italian rapper"
She literally called herself a shamefully bad decision. Of course I slept with her. Best bad decision ever
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
Ryan learned the all important lesson tonight; Red Bull gives you wings, Jaeger gives you gravity.
We're at the urgent care down the street from you if you care to stop by
He makes me want to shower. It must be love.
Its Nebraska, I'm sure im not the first person to wake up hungover in a corn field.
Didn't want to waste the cheese dust from the white cheddar popcorn, so I gave him a handjob, followed by the most delicious blowjob ever. Win-win.
I just found a piece of dried shredded carrot on my bed
So, I almost went hone with a French guy and a drag queen. Together. Then I became sober enough to realize, that's not my style.
Omg. I'm living macklemores best life. I have someone's granddads dog, I'm about to have someone's grandmas car. I look incredible.
Randomize
