bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
No matter what you may say to me. You will still be the guy that managed to get his own cum in his hair.
you kept going on about how you couldnt haven been the one throwing up because you were peeing in circles.
Of course she said it wasn't that good, I don't bring my A game to pity fuck the thrice divorced girl from work
Hey man, I found your crocs and your visor in the road. Got em for you.
I dont know what we smoked last night but I woke up and found out I started writing a book called White Trash Princess. Its the best thing Ive ever read
That's where the buck stops? Buying girlfriends online? THAT is where you draw the line?!
Why did you send me 12 pictures in a row of your expressionless face at 2:30 am?
Can we just cry and dive into a couch-sized bag of sadness-chips, dip them in a la-z-boy sized jar of depression salsa while watching a show called 'Forget Your Hopes and Dreams, Just Kill Yourself'?
my biography would be titled "haunting truths and dick jokes: a tale of love, loss, and masturbation."
Stoned stonnnnnnned on the raaaaange
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
Can you get the dildos out of the shower before the maids come?
Randomize
