Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
you went up to him and asked if you could have "friend sex." He looked like a 7 year old on christmas morning
his mom and I have the same butterfly tramp stamp. don't ask how that came up
well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
all i remember was you yelling "look at my little feet" at everyone on the way home from the bar.
I wore sweatpants. When I show up to a booty call in sweatpants there's your warning
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
I don't save the phone numbers of guys I don't like. That way it's a surprise when a random number texts me and tells me I have great tits.
Nick is about to bring home a woman who is 39, a mother, and, by all accounts, FUCKING HOMELESS. Will update as details become available.
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
That accounts for only three of the penises
To be honest, waking up to 20 naked people in my house was not the weirdest thing to happen to me in the past 24 hours
So as you were leaving, you leaned on the table too much and 3 glasses slid and fell to the floor. You then looked at me and said "To be honest, glass isnt that expensive anyways" and stumbled out of the bar.
I am literally watching TV with sunglasses on because the brightness hurts my hangover
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
Randomize
