We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
Just did the walk of shame across state lines...milestone?
unlike you, ive never imagined darth vader masturbating
just wokeup with my ethics textbook on my chest, animal crakers in my mouth and my dick in my hand. even aristotle doesn't have a theory for this one
Mark is going to get hypothermia. he is shirtless eating snow bc he "doesnt want to be dehydrated" tomorrow. youre in charge.
there was a fucking fire juggler. but it was ok bc i was in the kiddie pool and it was the safe zone
remember.. you're not a homewrecker.. you're just creating options for him..
After you tried speaking to him in whale you asked if you could see his "blow hole." That's how bad it was.
I'm starting to think I didn't bring enough liquor for this family Christmas.
It's 2 pm....
Who needs sounds of the ocean? I just fall asleep to whatever chubby he is banging next door.
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
Night one million where I have madri gra beads around my neck and no justifiable reason for where they came from
Just remembered that I got laid thanks to my glow in the dark Batman belt buckle. Need to wear it more often.
this bedazzled flask is my best investment yet
Randomize