OH MY GOD! I just remembered how we ended our bar time last night: picking up and drinking random drinks that ppl had left. wtf is wrong with us?! that's so ghetto!
No. You're kidding.
I am not. I wish I were. I speak the truth.
after he passed out we removed everything electronic from his room, stuck in some old books and an ancient typewriter from goodwill. for 20 min. we had him convinced he'd drunk himself backward in time.
for a minute I thought I needed to put on pants to go get a burrito, but then I remembered I'm in college
Even my Russian and Serbian roommates think I drink to much.
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
no one is here. wer drinking in the beer garden in the dark and we stole a bucket of blue paint off the sidewalk. now her legs are blue.
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
being pregnant is like rehab
The bend and snap? 98% success rate of getting attention. When used appropriately, it has an 83% rate of return on a dinner invitation.
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
Made out with some dude at the bar last night. Was fun until he thought bohemian rhapsody was by The Who
I apologize for there being a shopping cart in the living room. I don't know how why or where i got it.
YOU CANT JUST BLOW GUYS BC THEY’RE NICE TO YOU LEXI
I CAN IF I WANT TO
MY GUT IS TELLING ME YES AND SO IS MY VAGINA
Randomize