I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
I'm at a party with half naked strippers driving in a little kids battery powered mustang around a stipper pole in his bedroom
We still need to grow old, buy a house, and drink 40's while wearing old people sunglasses, staring at the young studs mowing our lawn.
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
there is a video of me from last night trying to light my breath on fire. that drunk.
Thanks for walking over, a conversation about David Bowie's dick as a muppet is exactly what my day was missing.
Well you know it's going to be an interesting night when the bathroom attendant is doing hail marrys
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
Look. If you're going to be my girlfriend you need to be down with me licking BBQ off your face infront of kids.
I have learned that if you don't want to hook up with the guy who walked you home, food is great compensation.
I feel like I'm laying on a pillow cloud. With little baby angel fingers between me and the cloud lifting me up. Singing hymns in my ear.
I'm actually kinda upset that we didn't consider velcro-ing detachable capes to our clothes before this moment.
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
Flirting with/getting ready to possibly sleep with a married HS classmate and getting added to a bible study group chat within minutes of each other. #Balance
Randomize
