I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
Do you need to be saved?
No I think I'm God
Dude!! Mom just asked me why you have 'boobies' hahaha
I hate my life
I had a drunk dream I lived on a puppy farm. I hope this dream repeats every night of my life.
At the miami airport. Don't know if it's all the tequila I drank in cozumel or the 5 year olds french accent but I might puke.
can't make this up: he's writing lyrics for the musical reenactment of how he met her @ an anime convention to perform at their wedding. yes, there'll also be dance routines involved.
Funny how often beer equates to second degree burns on some portion of my body.
This dude. Just lost. A finger. He asked us for tape.
Do I not have a Brazilian bc of my boyfriend situation or do I not have a boyfriend bc of my brazilian situation?
P.S. I just made up pleasure scepter for the purpose of that last message.
Pro: she asked me to be a bridesmaid. Con: i only have about nine months to get over a phobia of midget strippers.
Btw his name is Woody. I must be really drunk to think this is a good situation
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
I'm like, not good at living.
His mom wants to come see the dorm.
Hide the whip.
Randomize