I am full of burrito and curiosity
you drank a bottle of vodka and then while throwing up in my toilet you kept reminding me our hs reunion was in 2 yrs and it was time to start getting thin again anyway
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
Your sister reminds me of me at her age. Stop her while you can.
let's get a trip to cabo together for next spring... they have to have forgotten about me by now
I just wanted to give you a heads up. There's a crab in the kitchen. He doesn't have a name yet. We are just calling him crab for now. Oh! and we have memosas!
I was to the point where my socks were drenched in ranch dressing
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
Just traded the drive-through guy at BK a Dos Equis for a Hershey pie before noon... win?
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
From the bottom of my heart, thanks for never sending me unsolicited dick picks.
Because you hugged a homeless guy, and I paid him 5 bucks to give us our giraffe balloon animal back. That's why.
Officially spring today. First sighting of loud-ass Steller Jay on the balcony.
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
If you survived your 72 hour masturbation marathon put on some pants and come over. My mom dropped off a lasagna.
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