My grandmass entire neighborhood is over for dessert and i'm high as fuck...about to make a couple of freshman boys real uncomfortable
Freshman in high school? Just your type
Dude if you're in another zip code it doesn't count
You don't understand. I'm not like you.
at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
Just saw a picture of your new tub, cant wait to pee in it
You weren't lying about those ceramics students giving the best hand jobs.
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
drinking vodka, listening 2 smh at 530am slow cooking beef stew. you'll enjoy the stew and worry abt me in the morning. bon apatite
She got drunk on the air plane and pretended to be an elephant for an hour...Atleast the kid behind us enjoyed it.
My kid just put flowers in my hair to make me pretty, then showed my boobs to an entire playground. He's either the best wingman or the worst.
Aaaaaaaand dick pic. God bless america, and god bless tinder.
I've been with my family a total of 20 minutes and I'm ready to go on a bender. This is going to be a long weekend.
The coast is clear - also, would it bother you if I chose not to wear pants?
YOUR MANICOTTI IS FULL OF LIES
Sorry i meant to send that to my mom
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
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