Dude. I haven't taken a shit in a week.
Try anal, it works wonders.
Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
Somehow she slept thru the vacuuming, people walking in and out, and the sound of constant beer bottles hitting the trash, but when someone said weed in a regular volume of voice she startled awake.
Apparently I tried to convince him to sleep with me by showing him that I could do dips....
I hit on her. So did Sarah. Neither of us got anywhere. I swear she's asexual. Like Switzerland.
I just don't do feelings in the summer months.
I told you he wasn't attractive.
Do you think I cared? I was wiping myself with a scarf..
answer my text you professional douchebag
and i mean that in the cutest, flirtiest way possible
I got to walk around for eight hours wearing power armor and acting camp. No way I wouldn't love it.
can you tell me why i woke up in a diaper and combat boots?
There’s a special place in hell for tall guys with small dicks
He saw me naked after our first date and still asked for a second.. so I think we’re doing good
If I'm not there when the plane leaves, I didn't make it through security. See you at home! Vegas bitches!!!
Randomize