when a 14 year old is judging you, you know you've had too much to drink
It's like a mixture of two words
"town" and "Im too drunk to spell right now"
Isn't it statistically impossible for THAT many ugly people to be in one place at one time?
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
You should get a handy in the street again, just to prove you've still got it.
Were gonna hotbox in the trunk. I think there's room for another half of a person if you're interested
Wors thing about having a cop dad: random drug testing
6 beers, 3 orange crushes, & half a fire ball later & you get my alter ego.
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
You're always so late and I'm always so drunk.
I have an empty apartment, Chinese food, and fresh batteries in my vibrator. There's nothing on this earth that could lure me out tonight.
Banged a girl last night wearing nothing but my Team USA Olympic jersey. I think it's safe to say that nut was for America.
Don't get into any trouble on your trip
The only foreseeable trouble would be pregnancy, but I gotta be sterile otherwise I'm beating some pretty fucking incredible odds
Randomize
