is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
He said "what's the haps". I don't know what the haps are but there goes his chances
She was giving you that "I really want to blow you but I have to act professional" look. Guaranteed
high enough to want to lick peanut butter off of Michael Buble's vocal chords as he serenades me.
they drunkenly created an obstacle course for the poor hamster and its ball.
I was barred out and drunk as fuck locked out at 3am in my Indian costume. It was literally freezing outside. I laid down on the concrete and made a bonfire with dry leaves. Then proceeded to ask.the.bonfire nicely to "please dont go out". Drunk me went strait up survival mode.
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
I still think he fell and scraped his elbow and lost his credit card buying 8 hot chocolates for hobos
He said I showed up in just my underwear and a bunch of towels I stole from the party I was at.
WHY IS IT FROWNED UPON THE DRESS UP IN CAT COSTUMES AND SIT OUTSIDE OF BARS WITH A BOX OF WINE I THOUGHT THIS WAS AMERICA
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
When you licked the fourth stranger's cheek the bar tender pretty much ordered us to get you out.
How do you clean puke off a stuffed bear?
So I paid Bumble $10 to see who liked my profile for a month. Cheap, easy dick. It's all about the economics, yo.
I cannot pick him out of a line up. I remember he is blonde and his half flaccid dick looks like gonzo. So unless he pulls down his pants I don't know who he is
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