Bea Arthur died! :(
What?
Big bird passed.
dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
he called to tell me the scratches were still on his back. this was in the summer.. still the best hookup
The sweet smell of jungle juice and bad decisions is calling our name.
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
I always ask when they're due. It's the nicest way for me to let her know the rest of the world can tell she's putting on weight too
Now I'm obligated to stay and cuddle with her because the condom broke. Fuck.
I have to have sex on a bidet. I'm not sure what kind, but it's reason #4 for an Italian vacation!
He called his dick "The Beast" and said he lived "The Beast Life". He was pretty but it was better if he didn't talk.
You gave my cousin a blowjob and are facebook friends with my mom. Is there a name for this level of friendship?
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
He found out about your side hoe and still helped you try to find a lizard that got in the house
Oh? And how would you explain this to your kids?
"Well pumpkin, when mommies and daddies have loved each other so much for a really long time, sometimes they trade off with other mommies and daddies"
Randomize
