Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
I just broke up with Liz. I feel awful so I put two free rentals on her Blockbuster account.
is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
Last night I ate the rest of the salsa with my hands. And i DONT have a hangover? Glorious.
According to google history I spent most of last night trying to buy an elephant.
230 lb girl across the train from me is giving a dude in a kilt a handjob while he sits in her lap
Did I get stoned on a sunday afternoon and speak to someone on the phone for an hour about cats and their behaviour? Glad you asked. And yes.
Don't pretend you don't want to dance on the edge of overdose all three nights
The other night he asked if I had a condom and I said I had an IUD. and he goes OMG A BOMB?
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
If my birthday doesn't end with my panties hanging from a ceiling fan, I'm holding you responsible.
He has no idea he’s my boyfriend.
These random guys found me. They told me not to wander in the woods and i remember saying 'am i fucking Bambi?! I'm not gonna walk into woods!' then i threw up.
Randomize