Why don't you ever send me any naked pics
why is every porn film shot in the same house? with the same red couch!?!
Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
The cops caught them pow wowing in the teepee at the entrance of the golf course at 5 am. But were still missing someone.
I walked in and you were laying on the floor bleeding everywhere half asleep half crying and moe was at the kitchen table eating frozen pizza refusing to acknowledge you. What a sight.
You. Me. A bottle of Vodka. The wilderness.
just woke up under a car ? That's odd
Holy fucking shit
WAIT BUT IM WEARING A BACKPACK THAT MAGICALLY HAS 30 BEERS IN IT
I came back and almost ran over two people passed out in my driveway I've never met before in my life
I just saw a herd of slutty loofahs run down the street...
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
She's trying to sext her husband for the first time. I'm feeding her lines. It is 3 am and I am playing Cyrano for my wasted big sister TELL ME I AM NOT THE BEST SISTER IN LAW ON THE PLANET.
My dick pics could make it to the popular page on Instagram.
oh the usual. high as balls and crying about the hunger games.
Take off your clothes and see if he wants to have sex, that's a good way to find out
Randomize