Do you have swine flu?
I know my taste in men is not always top notch; however, I don't sleep with swine.
Pigs, yes. Swine, no.
I've decided to film a documentary centered around how he manages to keep that beast caged in such tight pants
i forgot beer had calories. that would explain alot.
Accidently said "your going to hurt the baby" when he got forceful with his thrusts. I guess I forgot to mention to him that we are pregnant.
he kept saying that we were in ian's fun time place and then continued to act like a dinosaur.
1 tequila 2 tequila 3 tequila, floor.
*roof
I'm going on a new diet. It's called the "eat healthy otherwise boys won't want to have sex with your fat ass" diet. Wish me luck.
Okay. I am working on pulling a tooth out of my mouth. Call me.
Oh yea... In other news I've decided to get an external hard drive and start getting music from all the guys I'm fucking... Do you think a terabyte would be enough storage space?
Piñatas plus fireworks don't mix well
it is shots o' clock and I am never late
You know you are high when you are so glad it wasn't your freshly buttered raisin bread that fell on your foot. It was your $400 Ipod
Woke up next to a half eaten Philly Cheesesteak. Honestly probably one of the top 3 things I've ever woken up next to.
About to wash down a xan with an iced pumpkin spiced latte from starbs and I feel like I've never lived up to my stereotype so much at one time
Sextember may be over, but Cocktober is just beginning!!!
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