I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
so after morning sex, she rolled a joint and turned on sports center
you might have found the rare bro goddess. i thought they were myth
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
after eating me out, he asked for something to drink. i gave him a glass of water and he said he needed something stronger.
Won't anyone wonder why I'm mute, bald, and wearing an eye patch?
The Deck is crawling with Cougars. Sound the irresponsibility alarm and come drink with me on a Tuesday night.
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
Would it be playing god to put spaghetti on my pizza?
She may be more beautiful than I am, but I bet she hasnt pissed in as many public places as me...
Bringing my cat to a booty call was not my finest hour
I have booze and I wanna give you a bj. How can you be mad at me?
when you wake up naked in a bed with glowsticks, a rolled ankle, a hangover, and a condom; alone. you wonder shit
Honestly, if you don't have a lawsuit pending against you by this time tomorrow, I'll be impressed.
Hammered...8am...why is there chickens in the living room?
Randomize
