if you like me you must not know who I am
Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
i forgot what you looked like. so we left to get pizza. sorry
I found a tip from a dart in my bra this morning
This year I'm going to try NOT getting arrested. I think the 30th birthday is the cutoff for calling Mom to bail me out.
they're both probably 7 inches? or 8? I'm shoving a ruler in my mouth trying to figure it out
The problem is drunk me is completely unaware how poor I am
I'm taking a leave of absence and sending myself to fat camp. I'll let you know when I'm out.
Hooked up with a guy dressed as Miss Frizzle last night... Asked if I could ride his Magic School Bus
But I mean how many guys can say they get blow jobs and grilled cheese with football
I'm only bisexual one week out of the month. Nothing like ovulation hormones to make the genders of my hookups seem completely irrelevant.
What's the rule for getting in fights with homeless men in suits?
Here's a rule: don't
hey sweets how's ur crotch today?
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
Randomize