"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
I'm drunk. And at a vegan cafe. You would hate it. Don't tell my hipster friend but I kinda hate it too.
I didn't know it was possible to make picking up dog shit look sexy.
She did the bend and snap...
I just noticed she took the "toys" too. That's how you know when it's really over.
i just got on a party bus. i think i left my belly button at the bar.
He somehow managed to bang-mail me last night. I woke up this morning to a voicemail from 1:54 a.m. of moaning and screaming. I now know how talented he is and how annoying I am to have sex with.
We got a kitchen table so we would eat together more. So far we've played drunken monopoly and had sex on it.
Well I just found a coupon for cheese in the bathroom so I've got that going for me
You were carrying a 6 ft lamp that we stole on your back yelling "OHANA MEANS FAMILY AND FAMILY MEANS NOBODY GETS LEFT BEHIND"
I don't want to be drunk any more. Can you hit the off switch?
Aka I'm headed to the liquor store because I don't know how to handle my emotions.
Could’ve gone my whole life not seeing a man snort coke off another man’s cock... but there it is...
Plus he probably didn't want to be at home, alone... Jacking off on the big screen without you there to lend a helping hand. I mean, let's be honest. It's not fun if it's not a little weird.
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