What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
My Hamptons summer hookup resume reads like a walk-in clinic waiting list.
you were so high you were expressing yourself in action figures
My landlord doesn't knock anymore when he shows the apt... So i just had sex in front of a family.
didn't stop?
naw, they were rude, not me.
he has 3 profile pictures up and all of them are him riding jet skis
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
just convinced someone I was a virgin. I love when people don't know me.
There's some drunk girl alone in the field, she looks like she could use some help.
Also it's only fair that you know that that girl is me.
I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
i think he spiked my sandwich with a viagra
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
He showed up at my apartment drunk with a telescope wanting me to look at the "blown up star" in -24 degree weather, claiming "it's in the name if science"
I'm drunk filing my taxes in a bar on a Monday afternoon in a Regular Show onesie. I think I'm starting to get the hang of this whole adult thing.
Everybody posting sickening holiday couple pics and I'm over here deepthroating a bottle of whiskey.
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
Randomize
