Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
I'm taking a dump and eating a fortune cookie and it said "Force it to be successful"
She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
An ex-gang member just asked me out on a date via note. And spelled dinner wrong. Win?
Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
So the bartender just told me that there was numerous people who saw me having sex on the rooftop last weekend. +1
and then we had to stop you from trying to pour shots through your nose with the neti pot.
Woke up in my underwear and Christmas sweater. Only. Eggnog has won the battle but not the war.
You should have seen her, she looked like a skinny Jabba The Hutt
That literally makes no sense
Exactly
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
Could we try to replay the decision making process whereby only you and I bought and drank a keg this weekend? Because there were some fundamental flaws!
That time we were having sex when you were super drunk, I kept yelling out, "Oh God," and you said, "You're going to need him after this." Idk why I suddenly thought of that.
he was definitely tindering while i gave him head
My cat took a shit on the guy who passed out in the bathtub
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
Randomize
