at a bar with my ex girlfriend.. both men AND WOMEN are hitting on her.. and not one has even looked at me
he just flicked a booger into my mouth and shouted "goaaaal!"
I just found all of my Mary-Kate and Ashley movies. Can you say drinking game?
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
just got super drunk mixing jägermeister with my lyme disease meds. even if my face goes paralyzed, at least i got smashed from it.
when did my "fat clothes" just become my clothes...diet starts tomorrow
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
while you laid on the ground I poured water into your mouth out of dog bowl some random guy walks by and said now that's what I like to see.
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
Because I can't get laid, I'm day-drinking and hunting squirrels in the backyard. You can take the girl out of Montana...
On way back. With a shopping cart. Minimal casualties.
I hope I don't have to wait for another triple crown winner to get laid again.
NOT ALL OF US HAVE THE HANDS OF GODDAMN ANGELS YOU KNOW
I would give a kidney to fuck him and he knows it. That bastard.
I mean, drunk me really liked him, maybe sober me will too. Who am I to deny fate?
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