I am in a vortex of obligation.
May or may not have found my way onto a stripper bus. To Chicago.
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
normally i would apologize for my drunk texting but even sober me agrees.
That's like being smoked out by a unicorn. If the opportunity presents itself you fucking do it and don't ask questions.
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
YOU ARE THE WORST TRAVEL AGENT! THIS IS A SINGLES CRUSE FOR SENIORS. THEY ALL THINK IM THE FUCKING WAITRESS JUST CAUSE IM BLACK!!!
How did you not realize the handbrakes were stuck?
I thought I was just out of shape.
I don't know bro. If a girl makes you cum hard enough that you pull a back muscle, she might be the perfect one to call for a massage on said muscle.
You were throwing cups at people in the basement, yelling at them to get out of your swamp.
I'll screw just about anything, but I draw the line there
Can I just buy you sex toys as a wedding gift? Bc I’m here for that and you
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
Randomize
