Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
You talked to that cop for like 15 minutes and when you got back, you told us you were "networking".
Getting stoned and going to costco. If i'm not back by dawn, you know what to do.
he just ordered a side of pineapple and winked at me. too much for a first date. come get me.
Dude give me 4 good reasons we shouldn't trade girlfriends tonight
I told him I'd go cook him breakfast, but ended up passing out on the kitchen floor in the fetal position spooning the dog
He made me sneak beer in the diaper bag... guess who is winning 2012 parents of the year
Dude, I lost my shirt, and my doorknob is gone. I'm not sure which I should find first
Celebrating landing my dream job by watching zombie movies and drinking free booze in the bath. I'm like 90% sure I just won life.
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
Smoking a bowl and ordering Dominos, you want in on either, both, or none?
Oh my God it's like my cock was dipped in lava
A drag queen just ate a dollar out of my ass. I don't know which one of us has hit rock bottom
Perfect attendance and not being drunk since Sunday. This is a new leaf if I've ever seen one
might I remind you I fucked a 21 year old and almost did coke with strangers? you definitely came out on top
Randomize
