evidently tequilla and lady gaga make me flirt and grind shamlessly with other men infront of my boyfriend.
It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
you did pass out in the elevator last night, so it could be motion sickness
Washing the last semen-stained shirt you have really solidifies a breakup. It just got real.
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
I had five suicidal voicemails from him when I woke up this morning. They all started and ended with "DON'T FUCK MY ROOMMATES".
It was only one, it doesn't count.
He bought me shots at the bar as his way of of paying me back for Plan B
When they say "all expenses paid" does that include bail?
he tried to give me his business card but gave me his health insurance card then realized it and offered to take me to the strip club
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
I just had a man tell me he was going to think about me when he was fucking his wife tonight. This is my proudest moment as a gay.
I can't really text bc it's too expensive but I thought youd like to know I just shit myself in a gift shop.
I woke up thinking it was Friday. I was disappointed (to say the least). I am pretty sure I have gained the quarantine fifteen (but I won’t know until I try to put something other than elastic-waisted shorts on). And I am probably going to need dentures because I am grinding my teeth so much. But hey--this is temporary, right?
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