Ummmm I went to see who was upstairs, he was the only one in his room so we had sex while the travel channel played in the background.
Oh good. Romantic. Still, I'm jealous of the sex.
Probably not, since he made me promise not to tell anyone it only lasted ten seconds.
im pretty sure i just dented her unborn child.
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
something must definitely be wrong with me if i'm chasing after a guy who cant even get it up
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
i think the doormans mad at me
well we haven't pretended to pretend we were going to have a threesome with him for a while...
No driving. The car is spinning. I am praying for mcdonalds.
I feel like my teeth are caked on with other teeth. What did I just smoke?
You have like just as much sex as me and I have a brand new bf. That does not add up. That is not right.
Got high with dad and hunted squirrels in the basement. Is this seriously what my life has come to?
Woke up to the UT campus police fishing my boxers out of the university pool, guess it was a good night.
I think my ball sweat smells like waffle house. might be time to change up drunken eating habits
He asked me while we were fishing why the passion was gone when we have sex. It's official...I am the dude in this relationship.
No one knows how to work that "I pulled a muscle in my leg" drunk swagger like you can
Great... now even my dreams are making fun of me
Randomize
