Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
Apparently married women at the office don't like getting congratulated on getting "knocked up"
I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
please tell me you remember why "7 days" is written above my bed in red marker
The guy in the library beside me just whipped out an entire loaf of bread, a knife and a container of peanut butter and is proceeding to make multiple sandwiches.
I swear I could audibly hear her vagina slam shut when you walked up to hit on her.
All I remember is holding on to the elevator asking it politely to stop spinning
I'm voting my liver organ of the month. The award ceremony is next weekend.
How the hell did he get a boner in that type of situation?
Do you have any booze?
Well I have 60 feet of bubble wrap and a bottle of wine...but I'm saving that for a special girl...
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
Abby spilt her vodka all over the train's bathroom floor
WE'RE THE ONES DRESSED UP FOR THE LARGEST DRINKING HOLIDAY IN AMERICA WHO ELSE ON THIS TRAIN IS A SUSPECT FOR THIS SMELL?!
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
Poor guy. Tried so hard to get out of the friend zone. I had to make out with someone in front of him to put him in his place.
Why do I like him? He literally has no redeeming qualities.
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