kristin has been a bad kristin
I just had to have my mom look at my penis to figure out what it was. How do you think my day is going?
I just sneezed and it tasted like taco bell.
Your the only friend that would realize I'm gonna get drunk and send coke to me at a bar before I made drunken phone calls for it. You sir complete me.....
I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..
She said we should all be mermaids since didn't breathe for 9 months inside our mothers. I want her logic.
Just beat 2 Norwegian women in beer pong. Never been so proud to be an American.
I'm watching intervention which is getting me psyched for your birthday. Is that wrong?
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
It's whatever. Titanic is about to be on and we have wine, which is basically crying juice. Leo, Kate, and I will be having a lovely, pants free evening.
See this is where I mess up.. I get distracted by the option of consistent sex and free beer
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
Realization: many of my behaviors would lead to me being stoned to death in a lot of foreign countries. God bless America.
I wore my lizzie mcguire socks to the bar last night. Because that's how i get all the ladiez
Randomize
