Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
So I have $4.22 in my bank account, just wrote a check for a tooth brush from quikmart, and bought a 25 cent condom from the bathroom. i don't know whats more sad, my bank account or the fact that i'm entrusting my entire future to a condom machine that was probably last filled in 1970
Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
i'd like someone to explain to me why my clothes are all sticky. including my fanny pack. yes, this is a mass text.
I found your twin in sf. His name is ryan. And you are the evil one.
So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
I couldnt give him head when all I could hear was his little brother playing the piano and this family singing along to it.
i feel like you're just hanging onto the edge of functioning wino.
Oh my god. I'm sorry if i peed on you last nite. I am truly disgusting
and somewhere between crying in her arms and throwing up in her front yard, we became friends.
Perfect. And my grandma just called me and talked to me for eighteen minutes telling me that she was worried because of my Halloween costume that I'm not a Christian and that I'm not eating. Wtf.
At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
Side note: the physics of a guy my size and age getting laid in the backseat of a Toyota Camry are absolutely staggering
Randomize
