Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
Yeah, I think they knew. I smelled like that telltale combination of strippers and Easter.
As long as he sees me topless I don't care. Redemption. REEEDDDEMMMPPPTTIIIOOONNNNN
Which is worse rug burn on your nipples or laying there after wondering how long you have to cuddle before you can sneak away?
On a lighter note, my mom and I were playing scattergories, and for "things that you keep hidden" we both put dildo. Proof that we really are related.
Fell down the metal stairs and some guy tried to fight me after you left. I fell asleep with cadbury eggs in my mouth too.
Well good for him for getting your number before he told you he had no money and needed you to pay for his drink!
Sorry I can't go bowling with you guys. I'm getting daytime dick. That's the best kind.
THEY AREN'T MARRIED. PUT ON YOUR HOMEWRECKING PANTIES AND GET TO WORK. NO EXCUSES.
I was cracking open beer cans, throwing them off the roof, and yelling "FRAG OUT!"
Whiskey and tits go great with anything. Especially fire.
I'm eating Swedish fish out of my boobs and watching SOA.. There is no way your Tuesday night will be better than mine.
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
Randomize
