"it" just moved
If you were a Panda and I were a Koala and we had a baby, it'd be a falafel. Just think about that.
hey this is lauren, i have to type for jon because he's convinced the tongs he's holding are his real hands
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
is cock-oriented a word? I'd say I'm that lately.
Today needs to die. The mail delivery guy watched me throw up in my yard while taking my chihuahua out in Christmas pajamas at noon. Low point in my life.
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
I think curling is the best thing to watch when you're baked.
I miss forts and drugs that made me believe in unicorns...
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
Yeah yeah I know I have to bring your dog back.
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
I woke up with the gnarliest cold/hangover combo
Thats what u get when u have butt ass naked rooftop sex at night in december
Worth it.
I danced shirtless on a platform with a fucking stripper who went to MIT
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
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