Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
It was kind of weird
What did your mom walk in?
She flung her tampon across the room.
high people should be assigned attendants
we need to drink 2009 down the drain
I was so high last night that i'm 89% sure my roommates set up an obstacle course for me and timed it. Not positive.. I think one of the challenges was pairing shoes
i'm pretty sure i lost all sex appeal when he caught me peeing in his bushes
He legit asked if he could come over for a hug. I feel like I've been booty called by a 12 year old.
I am stoned and listening to the Olympics music I downloaded on Saturday. Best 6 dollars I have ever spent.
I don't know what to say to that. All I know is my vagina is trying to jump through the phone.
Good morning! So would you prefer me to show up kind of late or on time but looking like I got chewed up and spat out by an episode of Buffy the Vampire Slayer?
Let's never forget the time I met you while you were running down the street naked and in handcuffs.
If the ex isent in town and im crying under a table somewhere because of it can we go to a drag show or something
Needless to say, I woke up on the bathroom floor wearing the dress that my mom wore to the wedding. That open bar stole my soul.
I bought Plan B for the first time and an interview outfit today. You could say my life is improving.
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
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