i'm in the sorta mood where i wanna be that crying, drunk girl who will hook up with anyone that tells her she's pretty
discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
do you ever just like the smell of your farts?
I met him yesterday and now he's wanting to hold hands and kiss in public. i hate this
no i brought the cat to the bar. I got a weird look when I walked in but now everyone loves her.
Just made a PowerPoint called "Reasons Why You Should Fuck Me" at his request. The sad thing is we've had sex before...
Ugh I hate you, and the responsible adult life I pretend to have during daylight hours
An image of us stuck like that like Pompeii comes to mind. A wonder for future anthropologists
At this point, I wouldn't be surprised if he laughs at all of our attempts to keep him sober.
My sister's exploding appendix just cock blocked me...
Yeah I either headbutted a street sign while texting or I defended you two from an evil gang of nazi muggers. I was black out so I am gonna assume it was option b.
it's like that time i was drunk at relay for life. but with balloon animals...
After 25 beers and 3 shots my best friend thought it would be an amazing idea to get his dick pierced. We are on our way.
I woke up and there was a huge blow up palm tree in my bed...
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
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