PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
Did she have bad breath? Bad breath makes you think of all the bad things in the world
We just for robbed for the second time. I believe the only thing I have left to my name is my $75 dildo
Noooo. We thought it would be funny for him to wake up buried in the sand. But we just remembered about the whole high tide thing and it's dark and it's pretty damn hard to find an unconscious head sticking out of the sand. Just help us out
It's taking 3 penises to fill the hole he left in my heart.
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
I have a theory that years from now they will be with women who despise me because of what I trained their husbands to like.
You're wearing a hospital gown and pearls. Let's reevaluate your life.
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
I almost don't wanna have sex with her because I'm afraid she'll steal my hat
Just called the boss a "cunt baguette". To her face. This is why I can't drink with people from work. Know of anywhere that's hiring?
Um so I might have accidentally on accident maybe blew up the bottom half of your truck...
By the time we got to McDonald's you were sharing a Big Mac with a stripper.
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
Randomize
