closing bar tabs have helped me with simple math in college.
his tattoo said carpe diem which i thought was ironic considering his epilepsy
On my list on ridiculous morning after bus rides home, still sopping wet and carrying a giant straw hat is definitely top five
Well today was Thanksgiving Anti-Miracle Daydrinkathon so I had to be drunk by 2pm
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
I have a fannypack full of condoms and acid. Let's get weird.
Honest to god.. She looks better fat. I never would have imagined those words coming out of my mouth, EVER.
I think I broke my hip playing drunk ping pong
Are you setting a date to bone me?
Are you accepting?
Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
I woke up at 4 am to a guy curled up in the fetal position sobbing in our front yard. Oh college.
just woke up on the floor of my shower...it was still runnning
drinks after work?
that question mark offends me.
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
Did I honestly think it was a good idea to wear my pink robe out in public at 2 in the morning ?
Randomize
