I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
I keep trying to sit and the chair keeps running away from me
you ran down to the water at 3am and rolled in the sand and ran around screaming that you were the corn dog monster.
My water bill is like twice the normal amount. I need a boyfriend.
Do I even want to know?
my feelings for you are synonymous with those of a grizzly bear and salmon. i don't want to nom on you; but i need you to survive
my shower just felt like jesus cried on me. like he shed tears just for my shower.
Also, we should really buy some bandaids. Right now I'm using toilet paper and scotch tape, but I don't really think that's sanitary.
Woke up chewing my pillow from a dream where I was scarfing Cajun pasta from TGI Friday's. That's a new level of fat, even for us
So, just in case you go to the bathroom in the middle of the night.. Sam is asleep in the first stall.
I was thirsty after the sex and it was a long trek back to res so naturally I stole chocolate milk from his fridge as I left
If I get one more "oh yaaaaa he changed your oil" texts, I'm gonna lose my shit
I'm sure as hell not getting hoodwinked into going back to rehab again
Imma make him fuck me with my jersey on tonight while I chant Go Jets Go. Gotta love playoff hockey szn.
I know... It's stupid... It's like, I have sex with his brother and bestfriend ONE time....
Broken heels while double fisting margaritas, picking up shirtless, bloody men and escorting them out of harms way, the meltdown when I realized I can go without a bra bc my boobs shrunk, the morning vodka red bull you were forced to drink? Which one roped you in?
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