Fyi I let myself into your place, I'm wearing some of your clothes in your bed. Come take them off
Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
you pissed in a zip-loc bag and wanted 60 dollars for it
Shit. Come in my room. Bring a trashcan and an icepack
as my niece was drinking milk out of a crown royal glass i realized i dont think i've ever bought a glass that didnt come with a bottle of liquor....
I never kept track of who else he slept with. You think I have the time or the energy to keep track of every dick in my life?
love being home for thanksgiving just had grandma pick me up from the frat by her house
I don't remember you taking the condom off last night. Did you just walk home in it ?
I feel like someone had their period in my eyes.
I'm sorry I got a little outta control last night.
Yes stubble LOOKS hot but factor in his shitty bj skills and I might as well have jacked off with apricot scrub
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
Do you remember when I didn't post that pic of you fucking an avocado on your boss' desk? Can you return the favour?
I can't really text bc it's too expensive but I thought youd like to know I just shit myself in a gift shop.
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