I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
Can we reminisce? I held a mans penis while he peed. This is the craziest night I've ever had.
how the FUCK am I supposed to macarena while doubble fisting?
Seriously, stop peeing all over the toilet seat. It looks like movie theatre butter.
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
Is it a bad thing I remember to take my birth control when I stumble across guys I've had sex with on facebook?
He started to notice that i sleep with every girl he calls dibs on.
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
Im eating these cheese filled pretzels. So good. Theres jizz dripping out places i didnt even know i had.
Maybe before the beach I should get a tracking chip in my arm.
I feel like as your wife, as cool with your decision-making skills as I usually am, there should be a bigger explanation to you adopting a child while I'm in Houston.
There is a special place in Hell for whichever one of you put Ben Gay on my dildo. It was a very uncomfortable April 1.
I sent him this really overly apologetic text asking him out. It was just sad. Not even 27 shots of whiskey can grow me a self-esteem.
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
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