Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
guys don't fucking realize that the only place girl like their faces jizzed on is in PORN, and that "squirting" is piss. JUST FUCKING PISS.
Haha, bad night?
taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
I'm over this relationship. I'm just going to get drunk all day, wake up in a puddle of my own vomit again, and go on with my life
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
Having my alarm go off at 3:30 makes me wanna rip my dick off and shove it through my eye socket
Just a heads up... Don't get high and attempt to do your own taxes
i seriously haven't spoken to him since i drunk dialed him and told him i loved his beard
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
This electrician is just ripping my house apart and I'm too hungover to ask questions
How the hell could he be confused. He had a naked girl running to him. I feel like he would enjoy that.
I fell asleep giving a handjob, had a sex dream about giving a handjob, and woke up giving a handjob. Life.
in the past 2 days I've ruined2-3 lives, made 2 men quit the bar, started a Wednesdays only affair, ended it, ruined that engagement and had my tires slashed by a jealous bouncer. please stop letting me out....
Come over here. Bongs and porn. I found the promised land
Omg dude take a shower. You'll feel like god washed away all the sinful shit we did last night.
Randomize
