When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
i guess its not very common for a paramedic to have to revive someone who was struck by a falling shampoo bottle while getting off from the bathtub faucet.
I feel like dying is the new "adopt an african baby"
He just randomly started talking about Haiti and Conan O'Brien and his grandpa's hip replacement operation. It was the worst phone sex I've ever had.
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
Staying in I think. Boyfriend has domesticated me. I'm making eggs naked right now. Also really high.
He said last night that he'd never had such a great conversation and such a great handjob at the same time.
She texted me shhh....im drunk, secret booty call...how could i say no?
1st rule of birth control pills: do not stop taking birth control pills. 2nd rule of birth control pills: do NOT STOP taking birth control pills.
We looked in every room for condoms... It was the sexiest scavenger hunt ever.
I'm going to miss hockey season. It was the best excuse to get drunk on a Tuesday night.
I woke up and finished the bottle like a champ
You know the rule about how you feel bad for getting food and not offering other people you're around, does that apply when you eat burger king at a strip club?
Did you have a good sleep?
if a good sleep includes waking up cuddling a bottle of wine I had a GREAT sleep
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