She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
mom just called and i was mid bong hit but i answered anyways coughing and sounding rough she the apologized for waking her little angel up. its 2PM
Eric and I got kicked off of karaoke last night. Apparently, singing about masturbation to the tune of "A Whole New World" is not appropriate and definitely frowned upon by the DJ.
I am gunna fuck the accent right out of her mouth
you know by doing this we are using dad as a drug mule right?
Just ran interference for her again. Sometimes i wonder how many times in my life i'll have to be a cock block at the clinic
Fuck you. how could you leave me passed out hangin out my truck window when you knew it was starting to rain?
somebody put my brain in a crown royal bag and beat the shit out of it
Why is there an ambulance refusal in my pocket? I'm never going drinking with you again.
I ripped the door frame off last night too. Just remembered.
Showed up physical therapy hammered. The therapist just says this isnt part of the program.
I don't think you understand. I woke up under the car. At 3 am. In the club parking lot.
I left the bar I'm on a bench across from the bowling alley taking a nap please come get me. I've had three lollipops.
time to play the game of how much Christmas shopping I can get done before these shrooms kick in
She has also never texted me first which I think might be a tell-tale sign she wants me to die alone.
Randomize
