I drank mimosas and played bocce ball in the middle of finals week...now i know how Comm majors feel all the time.
He just walked into my room in a robe with a cooking pot of cereal.
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
If you see my mugshot on the news tomorrow, its not what you think
Just realized how sopa could affect my ability to watch porn, son of a bitch
I was ashamed to still be in my green tank this morning, but there's a guy here in full on bright green pants and a green blazer. He looks like the lucky charms guy stretched out at drunker than usual. Now, I fade into the background.
Ya I painted "STOP TRYING ANAL" on her headboard. I'm sick of listening to her whine through the wall and bitch the next day.
We need to go back to the barter system so I can sell my body and just be done with it.
All you kept saying was, " Barack fucking Obama. FUCK Michelle" and then you motorboated me.
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
I forgot her safe word. It was a rough night.
I told my parents how nice the girl at the frogurt store was. I neglected to mention that I nearly lost my virginity to her via foursome.
Mmm vodka always tastes better when i know i have work at 8am
I'm not saying it wasn't great. I'm just saying sleeping with a gassy, depressed,45 year old mother was a different experience. Would do it again though.
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