they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
She's like Mona Lisa when she's intoxicated. No one understands her but they all think she's marvelous
fell asleep with the bong in the pool, weirdest tan line ever
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
When you wake up in your dorm right outside your room with the key in the door, then you will understand my pain.
Any day you don't mysteriously wake up in the garbage is a good day.
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
I feel like I deserve an award for facing my fear of penises in my face.
i would compare it to sliding down a velcro-covered fireman's pole naked. no more bearded men for me.
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
Also, your girlfriend apologized to me about yesterday. That was nice of the cunt.
i had to win in rock paper scissors, get called a fat whore, and make two dudes get in a fight so we could call next game on the table and you make zero cups. thanks asshole.
I just remembered that I insisted everyone watch porn together last night.
My parents heard a lamp fall and crash and the dogs were barking like crazy so my mom got up to check. she found you peeing in a corner by the tv. And you kept shhhing her.
Randomize
