Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
he just put it in my mouth and said "go"
tried to be sexy and unbutton his shirt with my teeth. ended up slobbering all over it. thank god he was already passed out
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
she bonged a coffee cause she was hungover. then she bonged a beer cause she got ambitious. then she barfed. then she had to start over again.
We just ended up getting drunk and doing field sobriety tests on each for practice... No one remembers who passed.
I only call her for sex and medical advice. She admitted she feels like a worried parent when her phone rings at 5 a.m.
What?! Why else would they put table cloths on a table if not for discreet oral sex? That's why they were invented! Read a book...
I'm having post-experience "why didn't I fuck her in a public bathroom" regrets
He is getting married. In the time it took for this conversation he probably cheated on her three times
Also I am throwing a blaZer over what I wore to bed and calling it an outfit.
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
You yelled at me about a fork.
You probably deserved it, I'm very territorial about my cutlery.
Randomize
