OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
Honestly, where the fuck is osama bin laden?
Kinda wish I banged him. I need the exercise.
...that's why he's not doing anything with his life except breeding geckos
i'm having the hardest time convincing my roommates to go dumpster diving for pizza with me. i really miss you..
stuck in traffic next to occupy boston. smells like patchouli and unshaven pubes
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
I don't remember much of half-time. I do remember climbing onto the roof of the fraternity and telling people I was going to stargaze in French.
you missed an awesome concert last night. some middle aged woman that was grinding on me kept trying to stick her hand down my pants. i ended up rewarding her tenacity by letting her hold onto it for a song, i think it made her night.
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
Cause a man that looks THAT good must have an ass that tastes like lucky charms
I feel like satan and death had a baby that took a shit that replaced my brain.
I think he's trying to finish jacking off before throwing up again
You proposed a left ass cheek firmness contest and got a surprising number of contestants. Then you ruined it by groping someone who wasn't playing and awarding them first place.
Randomize
