Plan A DEFINITELY worked... Go with me to get Plan B??
eh.. i should've known it was headed downhill after he used the phrase "pussy sundae"
She actually said during sex "the only thing that would make this more perfect is if we were listening to Lenny Kravitz"
So, obviously, you had to give a fake number this morning.
Yes. Also, we may never be able to go back to that bar again.
we seriously had to hang a plastic bag on his ears so he could throw up right into it.
you wanted the guy to gift wrap the condoms
I found a tip from a dart in my bra this morning
she drove 3 hrs one way just to sleep with me. I felt bad complaining about paying for condoms.
So yeah you need to stop having near death experiences at McDonalds.
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
Also, turning on the light this morning was a 3 step process. Way too hungover.
At what point would you like us to save you from yourself?
I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex
College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?
That's true because who the fuck doesn't love Harry Potter and beer
Fuck. What bets did I make about "yeah when the Cubs win the World Series" that I gotta reneg on????
THIS IS NOT A LAUGHING MATTER, CAITLIN. MY PARENTS ARE FUCKING. LOUDLY.
Randomize
