I swear, if I find out you're lying, I'm going to put your name on one of those herpes watch websites and put the link up on every social networking site in existence.
Let's play a little game called "Chill the Fuck Out" - you're our first contestant
I'm hard boiling eggs, drinking rum, and talking to my 8 year old brother about the 10's times tables. This is what thursday is all about.
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
I haven't gone out since the baby was born. If I don't get arrested, in a fight, or both I'm going to be super pissed.
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
You fed me pizza off a sword last night.
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
I can't. Currently naked covered in Nair trying desperately to catch his cat that rubbed up on my leg.
I hate that cat.
I just walked out topless, stared his brother straight in the eye, and ate all the rest of their cookie dough.
I'm so baked, I spent the last hour trying to screencapture the cracks on my phone.
The convent might be a nice break from real life
I'm 2 weeks in to my all dick and carb diet and so far I've lost 2lbs.
how does that bad decision feel?
Just because you can't have him, doesn't mean you can have his brother.
What about the best friend?
Randomize