He muttered something about having just washed he sheets, then demanded I give him all my quarters.
remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
It's my fault I'm alone. My closest relationship is with my blackberry....thank god it vibrates.
it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
He's taking me to Burger King to celebrate losing my virginity..
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
He was taking the condom off and he turns to me and says, "You know how snakes can shed their skin?"
Bombed my 8 a.m. exam and the liquor store doesn't open till noon. Drinking unfinished beers from last night till they open.
My inner buddhist recalls, "You receive the d when you aren't looking for it, only when the d wants you." True story.
I thought it was my alarm clock, turns out it was her vibrator still going off on the side of my face.
Just puked in my hallway. Good start to a great night
Cool. I might be making a sickly but incredibly well dressed wine drunk appearance in a couple hours
I just drank beer out of an old Vicodin bottle hoping to catch some residue. That's how finals week is going
you bounced a quarter off my butt and it came back hitting you in the eye. karma, bitch.
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