So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
what made you think it was a good idea to trust the girl that hides tequila in her backpack?
I'm thinking about that time I was in a trashbag and you spray painted my hair yellow
Honestly, it was easier to just put it in my mouth than to deal with an awkward conversation.
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
Its not personal, its just business. I'm the Donald Trump of blowjobs.
There's a stoned dwarf chilling in the basement here. Maybe there are redeemable qualities about this place.
The blackout version of me left a ransom note to the sober self. Somebody needs to control that guy
Officially drug you out of White Castle last night by the hood on your sweatshirt after you cussed out the attendant and stole the satisfaction guaranteed sign because they were closed!
And then we felt it necessary to continue drinking for another 4 hours, yikes
They wouldn't let me on the bull because I couldn't even sign my own name... She let me try 3 times...
This hangover is what we deserve after that level of debauchery.
he told me that he only likes small dogs. I should have known he was going to end up being little bitch.
How do you say, "I love you, but i prefer sex with someone else." in a good way? Ponder that over a jack and coke and get back to me.
While finding our clothes afterwards he says..."So do we like have to talk after this?"
Remember when you laughed that I downloaded a “fireplace” station on my Roku? I just woke up butt naked on my couch with my fireplace station playing. So there, guess that shows you. Now excuse me while I go back to sleep in front of my fireplace.
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