im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
dude she snuck out while I was still sleeping then was banging on the door 10 minutes later cuz her car was brokedown. how was I suppose to recognize her??
i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
Postcard from jail please. Reserving a spot on my fridge.
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
just an fyi, false alarm on the whole ghonnorea thing. you're safe.
I thought you should know that there is a scientific law stating that when there is booze, people talk about your dick.
He was like low grade Riff Raff, but I hit it. Twice. His grill popped out the second time.
Did my roommate wake up in your girlfriend's apartment in drag again?
FUCK IM ABOUT TO GET A DICK PIC IN THE LIBRARY
I need a drink. No, several. I need several drinks. Drunk, I need to be drunk. Definitely need to be drunk
At first I was nervous, then drunk me thought: What other chance will you realistically have to fuck a British guy?
you were trying to drink the laundry detergent and yelling blue drankkkkk
Do you remember standing up at 3 in the morning and asking me if I was counting to six?
Randomize
