didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
Jesus can read your poker face... He is not pleased
I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
Is it too weird if im a sexy tampon for halloween?
so we told my parents we were going trick or treating. got high as shit at some playground. and then bought our own candy so we looked legit when we got home.
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
I may be in pain from falling off the roof but getting to the morning roof keg was well worth it.
Repeat the weekend mantra. "I like boys with teeth, I need boys with teeth, I deserve boys with teeth, I will have boys with teeth".
So on how many levels of wrong is it that I'm reconsidering my divorce simply because I don't want to go through getting used to shitting around someone again.
im breathing rainbows and everyone is talking in bubbles whatever you gave me give me more
To my wonderful winter break booty calls: thank you for making this holiday season enjoyable. I look forward to seeing you boys again this summer.
Now that there's no chance of him coming over to fuck anymore, I'm going to put up a one-person tent in my bedroom and live in it. My bed reminds me of him.
Got a handy at the foam party. Took girl home. Banged her. Thanked her for foam handy. "what handy?"
No, it's cool, I just bounced from the hospital. I was...talking to a security guard, maybe?
She's astronaut crazy. She will wear Depends and drive 12 hrs non-stop if you swipe right.
Challenge accepted
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