I woke up this morning with I hate myself feeling
she just waddled down the stairs behind me and puked and kind of reached for me but i sped up. does that make me a bad person?
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
Not really fighting over the same girl. He takes her out to dinner and then I come over and fuck her. We've worked out the perfect relationship.
Our local strip club now has karaoke. Do you realize what this could mean for my sex life?
thats what you get for writing a paper after liquor pitchers
its only a rough draft.
I'm drinking carlo rossi straight from the jug. I don't have any clean cups...how am I still at this point in my life...
ps I'm eating candy off our sex sheets. gotta say the only thing better than sweet tarts is sweet tarts with a hint of sex. perfect post vday situation
You don't understand. This could be the last time I shave a star into my vag. Get over here.
On our way there. Drinking my beer out of a coffee pot. Cuz it's my bday
I put my hydrocodone prescription in my cereal box its like real lucky charms
Dude. You stood in a corner laughing your ass off while folding clothes, facing the wall. Yes, they were weed brownies..
Dude. why do I feel like I am cheating on you every time I do shrooms?
Are you telling me right now that the weed man sexted you?
THE WEED MAN SEXTED ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
He is 6'5, went to a Christian school and he's a violinist....I'm going to fuck the jesus right out of him.
Randomize
